Lately…

I recently realized that although I’ve been doing a lot lately, not many people know about it! That’s me being a bad blogger. Where the updates at, yo?

Lately, I’ve been thinking wedding, wedding, wedding. I can’t believe how quickly July has come (um, hello end-of-June, where the fuck did you come from?!) and The Big Day is in two and a half weeks. (Oh. Shit.) I still need flowers (shut up). Also, what the hell are the groomsmen going to wear? Also also, how do you convince the groom-to-be that he should, I don’t know, ask his groomsmen to be his groomsmen? Also, shit.

Cheeeeeesecaaaaake.

Lately, though, I’ve also been getting excited about the wedding. I found my dress (no pictures, sorry – it’ll just have to be a surprise!) and lots of cute decorations for the reception, and I have a pretty good plan to do something to honor my dad during the ceremony and reception. I think a lot of my excitement is because of the cheesecake. No wedding cake for us. Just cheesecake.

Lately, I’ve been doing my best to enjoy my last child-free summer. I’m sure next year I won’t have many opportunities to kick my feet up and sit on our front porch, laptop in… lap, and enjoy the sunshine, breeze and superannoying dogs. I know next summer will be full of a million other simple pleasures, so I’m trying to soak up these simple pleasures. While I can.

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about boy vs. girl. Do I want to buy camo or pink (camo)? Do I want to play dress up or cops and robbers? (Not that girls can’t wear regular camo or play cops and robbers, but you get my point.) As our 20-week ultrasound draws nearer (July 13!), I find my mind wandering to boy vs. girl quite often. Will we have a son, or will we have a daughter? And, one step further… If we have a son, what kind of man will he be? Or if we have a daughter, what kind of woman will she be?

Lately, I’ve been wondering what kind of mother I’ll be. I think I ask P about once a week, “Do you think I’ll be a good mom?” He always says that yes, of course, he knows I’ll be a good mom. But when I ask, I secretly mean so much more than that. I mean, what kind of mom do you think I’ll be? Strict, but caring? Care-free, but thoughtful? I’m a firm believer that parents never really have it figured out, and that I’ll never know what kind of mom I actually am, because I’ll forever be learning and evolving not only as a mother but as a person… but I can’t help but wonder.

Photos: colemama, Tyler

Wedding update: 7-ish weeks & counting

I’ve decided I’m not having a maid of honor, nor do I want The Fiance to have a best man (though, he can certainly make that distinction if he wants). Instead, I’m having two bridesmaids. That is all. I’m not choosing one over the other. I’m not choosing favorites.

Before I really started planning this wedding (which is in LESS THAN SEVEN WEEKS FRICK) I thought for sure I’d have a maid of honor. And of course I’d have a few bridesmaids after that, too. But now that I’ve been faced with actually making that decision… I just don’t like it. I don’t like how it makes me feel. Choosing my best friend of YEARS and YEARS over the girl who has been there for me more recently through EVERYTHING, no questions asked (or vice versa)? Makes me feel sick. I DON’T like that.

So I’m not doing it.

Two bridesmaids. My two best friends. (I would have a third, but SOMEbody works on a cruise ship and is somewhere beautiful in Europe and can’t make it to the wedding. C’est la vie.) Nothing more, nothing less.

Two bridesmaids wearing this adorable dress (the floral print) (on sale! on CLEARANCE!) that I kind of sort of maybe wish I was wearing, too.

My big brother is officially ordained and prepared – legally, but not really otherwise I’m sure – to officiate the wedding and marry us. I love that. I LOVE the reaction I get when people ask, “Who is marrying you guys?” And I get to answer, “MY BROTHER!” But even more, I love that someone I love and admire, look up to and respect, is playing such an important role in all of this. I joke a lot about it, commenting about how I’m sure we’ll be all laughs because my brother is a comedian, but in all seriousness, I’m so excited and so honored that he is doing this for me.

End schmoop.

Invitations are (basically) done. I’ve handed some out, a bunch more are in the mail, but I still feel like we’re forgetting people… which probably means we are. Or not. I really don’t know.

 

Inspiration for my bridesmaids dresses. Pretty sure this is from Style Me Pretty (www.stylemepretty.com) but I *may* be wrong. Yes, my girls will also be wearing cowboy boots. Nothing else is really appropriate in sagebrush.

The invitations are semi-incomplete in that we didn’t include engagement photos like so many people do. Instead, I think we’ll have a table near the guestbook at the reception with different options for people to choose from. That’s assuming we actually get photos done within the next six and a half weeks, of course. So we’ll see. Also, the invitations don’t have those fancy little cards telling people where we’re registered. This is where I’m putting maybe too much faith in my fellow human beings and assuming they will visit the website listed on the invitations, because that is where our registration information is, directions on how to get to our house in BFE, etc. etc. I have a feeling I’ll be explaining that a lot, though.

And this is where this post ends because I don’t remember where I was going with it.

And then that happened. And THAT!

Well.

I really don’t even know how to write this post, where to begin. I guess it’s been like this for me a lot recently, and not just writing – talking to people, telling them what I’m about to tell you, has been difficult. Not because it’s bad, or even necessarily difficult itself (quite the contrary, actually, because I’m SQUEEing all over myself inside), but because… well, I just don’t know where the hell to start.

So I guess I’ll start at the beginning. And be blunt about it.

On Sunday, April 10, The Boy and I found out I’m pregnant! On Wednesday, April 13, I had my first doctor’s appointment, complete with pregnancy confirmation and… our first ultrasound! At that point, I was 6 weeks and 3 days… which makes me 9.5 weeks pregnant at this point.

And then, on Tuesday, April 19, The Boy surprised me with this:

He proposed!*

We’re getting married!

I feel the need to clarify here that we are not getting married just because we’re having a baby. But, to be honest, if you’re going to think that, you’re going to think it regardless of what I say. Though the truth is we’ve talked about getting married for almost two years now… it just so happens that this is the right time for us.

We are accelerating the engagement process a bit because of the baby, however. The way I see it, it’s just going to be easier to plan a quick, simple wedding while I’m pregnant than to plan anything with a newborn – and I really don’t want to put off getting married another couple years.

So, Big Day #1 is July 16. We will be married in a small ceremony at our home, with a large reception at the community building in town. Be prepared for wedding planning chaos posts (if I have the energy).

Big Day #2 is December 2. The Boy and I will be parents (that is SO CRAZY!) by Christmas. AH! Also, EEK! 🙂

Note: When calling your mother to tell her some big news (because you won’t get the chance to see her in person for a few weeks, and want to tell her RIGHT NOW), it might not be the best idea to start the conversation with, “Are you sitting down?”

* Sorry about the not-so-great photo quality, but… well, I’m not a photographer, especially when it comes to shiny rings.